Nicole feels

Any who have read me for an extended period of time know of my faith. Though I don�t talk about it perhaps as often as some may think I �should�, it is very much a part of who I am and everything I do.

One of the things I have tried to create here is a place where I can be totally me. Without excuses. Minus explanations.

Just Nicole.

For so long I defined myself by my roles. Wife. Mother. Daughter. Business Owner. Pastor�s Wife.

I realized I needed space to simply be Nicole.

That isn�t always easy for me. I want people to like me. I want them to laugh at my jokes. Be moved by my writing. Interested in my life.

Above all I want them to know that even pastor�s wives have quirks and insecurities and struggles and want to laugh and play and sing.

In making a place that is honestly me, my faith is, and always will be, an integral part, because it is an integral part of who I am. And that is simply because, to me, faith isn�t just about believing in something.

It is a relationship.

And as in any authentic, intimate relationship, it must include forgiveness and love.

After all, aren�t they really interconnected?

I mean, how could I say that I love my husband and not forgive him if he asks?

Probably the hardest thing I have ever done, or do, is to ask for forgiveness from anyone. God included. But I have. And He did.

And I am oh, so grateful.

So not only is that relationship a part of this journey, it is indelibly wrapped up into everything I do, say, am. Even when it is unspoken.

I count it an awesome privelege if in some small way my journey of connecting with God helps me connect with someone out there, or even helps connect them with God.

I am long past the days of trying to tell someone what they haven�t asked to hear. But if the questions come, I will give an answer for this part of me that is one role I am humbled and honored to hold.