Nicole feels

OK, so how many of you would like to boast that you met your sweetie at the drive-thru window at Taco Bell? I don't mean that one of you worked for Taco Bell and the other pulled up to purchase some synthetic beef tacos, and over the exchange of cold, hard cash, your eyes meet and it is love at first sight.

No, I mean, your dashing knight in shining armor sees you waiting patiently behind his vehicle for semi-warm pseudo-Mexican food and takes the opportunity to woo and wow you with his, ah, charms.

Case in point. Very late on Friday night, Rob pulled into a Taco Bell while we were traveling back from a speaking engagement. It was about 1:30 AM and we were hungry, and given the time, that was basically our only choice. As you might imagine, the friendly folks at TB were a bit slow at that sub-human hour. As we tried to place a rather simple order into the scratchy microphone-speaker combo, a person of the masculine variety pulls up behind us and proceeds to shout profanity in our direction, asking us to move.

Yup, my idea of Prince Charming. Makin' ya feel all warm and fuzzy inside with his command of the English language.

We ignore said Stud-In-Training. Finally the TB staff asks us to pull forward. Gladly. Mr. Studly is having such a good time with himself in his I-wish-this-was-really-a-hot-rod.

SIT continues his childish profane antics as we wait for our order at the window. Of course, they get it wrong. Twice. Ho-hum. Will we ever get out of here?

But wait, SIT spots specimins of the feminine variety in a vehicle behind his and begins "beat-on-my-chest, aren't-I-macho-with-my-bar-room-flirting" antics.

And to my utter amazement, said femmes ask this dork his name!

I am now convinced that they are all intoxicated or on drugs.

"Bob! That's B-O-B. Bob. The same frontwards and backwards."

Wow, he's intelligent too.

"Mom, I'd like you to meet B-O-B. Bob. Yup, the same frontwards and backwards! Oh, where did we meet? Exchanging cattle calls at our local Taco Bell. Isn't he a dream!?"